Looking back over the last century’s science fiction and futurist literature two things come to mind, a lot was right and a lot was wrong. Sure, the very creation of past fiction can drive the development of future technology, but quite often even the cultural implications are wrong.

The desire for mobile personal communications can go pack past even Dick Tracy’s watch. The influence for a drive towards portable cell phones can be seen in Star Trek. You think cell phones would flip open if Kirk didn’t have a communicator that flipped open on his endless quest for ass? But one thing that was not foreseen was the cultural interference.

Sure, the ability to instantly communicate with and desired individual from anywhere on the globe is hella-sweet, there is a down side. I don’t mean the traffic accidents, additional museum signs restricting cell phone usage, or even the now-constant chatter in every library I’ve been to in the last decade. No, what I speak of is the cultural interference in a Redbox line. No one foresaw that individuals would someday stack in the back of a line while a woman with an unnaturally large ass talks on a cell phone with another individual who is equally fucking stupid about a movie that a third party might or might not wish to view.

Now, when I say she had a large ass, I mean it was fucking crazy huge. If the continental US was tattooed on her ass, you would never find Nebraska. If her ass were divided amongst five other women, they would still have unnaturally large asses. I’m not even sure why she was on the phone with one individual talking about what movie another individual might want to view. There is no way that a couch exists that would allow her and two other people to sit in any sized room to watch a movie, unless the movie was to be shown on her ass.

Why the fuck can’t people use the goddamned internet for what it was designed for, research? Why can’t they go to a fucking computer, look at what titles are available on an individual Redbox machine, and fucking figure out what they want? Why do they have to waist my fucking time?

The recent patch for the Knidle provides an extended battery life, native PDF support, and screen rotation. Others see this as a blessing as well as a rather minor update that could point to something bigger. But in reality, it is fucking pathetic.

I love my Kindle 2. It is the best piece of technology that I have ever acquired. The home computer brought computing into the house, but it didn’t radically alter life. The Internet, however, completely changed the way a large portion of the population lived and interacted with each other. I still see the interweb as a research tool. Many of my generation, see the Internet as a communications tool. In truth, this is because they are ignorant savages bereft of intelligence. With the research tools available today, there is no need to ask anyone a question ever unless there is a lack of documentation, the person asking doesn’t know how to use the internee, or the person asking the question if a fucking re-re. Most of the ‘tards of my generation are as clueless as how technology works as my parents.

What I am trying to say is that as much as the interweb changed the lives of my generation from that of our parents, the Kindle has changed my life. I always have it on me. I used to keep a notebook listing books referenced by other books that I would look at and/or acquire at a later time. Now I just switch on the wireless and grab the book in question. Reading a normal book has begun to piss me off because it requires both hands to turn the page. The kindle is a fantastic piece of hardware. The hardware is elegant in every way and well thought out. Which begs the question, why the fuck is the software so shitty.

Why can I not let other users borrow books yet. This should have been there from the get-go. Native PDF capability should have been there at launch as well. i am a graphic artist and I can convert from any type of format to any other type of format. Anyone in my generation who doesn’t have their head crammed way up their ass distracted with sports and finding the latest bit of ass could convert a PDF into any other type of format. So, Amazon added the PDF capability for the fucking idiots who can’t get their shit together. The biggest sin in the Kindle software is the list. The inability to organize 1K+ books by topic or directory if fucking retarded. It made since in the original Kindle with that damn scroll wheel on the side, but with the Kindle 2, it makes as much since as running an Alienware system with OS/2.

So, yeah, the patch is nice, but for the fucking love of God, fix your broken shit.